Japan Day Seventeen : Coming home....

The last day began quite early as I needed to get up and pack up my stuff. With mine and Woo’s stuff all over the place, the hotel room looked like an earthquake had hit it. After breakfast I started the pack up and we were out of the hotel and waiting for our bus to Nagano by 9am.

We did have plans to go see the Zenkoji temple in Nagano, but it was snowing and all the streets were covered in slush. We hence decided to catch an earlier shinkansen into Tokyo and put our stuff in a locker and look around.

I slept most of the way from Nagano to Tokyo, so the trip went very quickly. When we got to Tokyo we went searching for the lockers. Unfortunately there were no lockers free that would fit our bags, so we paid 2500yen to leave them in a cloak room.

We jumped a train to Akihabra and searched for a few trinkets and other things that will remind us of Japan. Woo bought himself a Bumblebee transformer, which he was very pleased with. I bought a bobble head ninja for my desk at work.

We stopped for a coffee near the Tokyo station after we had returned from Akihabra. Woo decided he wanted to play with his Bumblebee. This is a toy that says on the box “ages 5 and up” and Woo was struggling just to be able to get the packaging open. He then followed the instructional diagram slowly and eventually had a transformed the Camaro into a robot. He then set about changing it back to a car, this would prove more difficult.

As I sat there and watched Woo fumble with a toy for five year olds, I thought about what I will miss about Japan. There has been so much that has happened over the past two and a half weeks that I barely know where to start.

I will miss the legs. Japanese girls have the best pins, hands down. It’s the middle of winter and they are wearing little skirts and stockings. Dear God, I will miss the legs.

I will miss the way everything just works. The transport especially, is unbelievably good. Even though there is an obvious language barrier, Woo and I were able to get whatever we needed, from change for the Laundromat, to changing our shinkansen tickets to an earlier train. We visited places that were not exactly set up for foreigners, and we thought we were gonna be screwed, but every single person we asked was always happy to help.

I will miss the service. I can’t understand them, and most of the time they can’t understand me. However, I have always been greeted with a smile, and that smile does not turn into a scowl when they realise I can’t speak Japanese. Throughout this trip, we have always been treated like we are the most important people in the room. Something that is severely lacking in the service one receives in Perth.

I will miss the soundtrack. This is really hard to explain, but Japan has its own soundtrack. This soundtrack is mostly a cacophony of sounds, assaulting your brain as Rambo would a Burmese concentration camp. On a walk through a tech store, the equivalent of a Rick Hart for example, and you will find Japanese employees standing on ladders, screaming at you through megaphones. Walk around any shopping district and you will be yelled at. Even though I am pretty sure they know I can’t understand them, they still yell. Walk into a Pub or restaurant, and in most places all the staff will scream “Hajimemashite”, which roughly means “pleased to meet you”. Rather than a beeping at the pedestrian crossing, there will be a little musical flourish to let you know it’s time to cross the street. Another little musical flourish at the train stations will let you know to stand clear, as the doors are closing.

I will miss the randomness. I cannot possibly put into words how truly random this pace is. It is like nothing you can imagine. Woo and I have totally worn out the words “that’s so random”. We have totally worn out the words “brain explosion” or “atama ga bakuhatsu”. There were even sometimes where things were so weird that all we could do was look at each other and laugh. They have strange cartoon characters everywhere, both for community announcements and for advertising. They have muscle bound cartoon men as Pachinko parlour mascots. Pachinko itself is a random ass combination of pokies, pinball and arcade video games.

After forty five minutes, Woo had returned Bumblebee to a Camaro. We then went and grabbed our bags and got on the shuttle out to Narita Airport.

I sat on the train, Woo reading my book which he has become addicted to over the past few days. Looking out the window I am very sad to be leaving Japan, more so than anywhere I have been before it. Unfortunately I am not as well travelled as, well, anyone I know really, but this place has changed me. I held my fingers to the glass on the train, trying to somehow tell the country itself what an amazing experience I have had, and how grateful I am for it. To let Japan know that I love her. To let her know that she has far exceeded all my expectations and then some.

I know I’m being much more flowery in my writing in this last entry of the blog. This is because I have come to a few realisations about my life and plans that I had regarding it, and assumptions I had made of the people who would be involved with it. Both related to the trip, and completely unrelated. It is also that while I am sad to be leaving Japan, I am ready and happy to be returning to Australia. Partially for all the obvious reasons such as sleeping in my own bed, with my own pillow (every pillow I had in Japan was awful) and being able to go down to the shops and not feel like a gimp because I can’t speak the language. I look forward to fitting in, well as much as I normally do anyway.

I started missing Australia when we were snowboarding. We’d spent so long avoiding Gaijin, that when we were forced to hang out with Aussies again, we resisted a little. Aussies are awesome. Yes, sometimes we may drink too much, sometimes we may get rowdy, we may even have four grown men playing stacks on in a hotel room. However we are a fun and friendly nation of travellers. Woo and I pretty much had dinner or drinks with a different bunch of people every evening while we were in Hakuba. All of them lovely. It was quite a relief to actually be able to converse with people other than Woo. No offense to him, as we have got along better than either of us imagined, but I need people around me. I miss my friends and I look forward to seeing them all again soon.

We got to the airport and checked in. I flirted with the possibility of dropping two grand on a new tiny laptop, but decided against it. Japan would be awesomely cheap if the exchange rate wasn’t so awful, so I decided to get it in Australia, as talk them down to a better price. We had our last meal in Japan at the airport and a farewell Sapporo draught. We then boarded the plane and said our final farewell to this fantastic country.

Japan. It hits you in the mind.

Japan Day Sixteen : Hakuba 5th day on the slopes...

Today was the last day on the slopes, and it hadn't snowed last night.

Woo decided he was not going to come boarding today as his neck was still very sore and we figured that with no snow last night, the runs would be very icy. I headed out at about 10am and was pleased to find the runs were reasonably soft, and the crowds weren't huge either.

Woo came down a bit later to take some photos, and was feeling better. When he found out the runs were quite soft, he decided he did want to board today, and then had to go back and get his board and gear. I ran into Monique and boarded with her for most of the day.

I normally stand goofy, which means I have my right foot forward. I spent most of today practicing doing it the other way, so with my left foot down the hill. By the end of the day, I was pretty decent at it, although I'm sure I dont look terribly smooth.

At about 2:30pm, they closed all the lifts at the top of the mountain due to high winds, and this brought shitloads of people down onto the beginner runs we were on. Not long after this I decided to call it a day (and a week) and end my snowboarding adventure.

I walked the 10min back to the hotel, and had a chance to look around the village. This whole area was originally built as the village for the 1998 Nagano Winter Olympics and the signs are still everywhere.

I got back had and shower and a bit of a nap before Woo and I went out for dinner with Kirsty and Josh. We went to a little place called Sari-Sari just down the road and had some tempura and also some more western food like Pizza and roast pork.

At the end of the night, the restaurant drove us back to the hotel, and I pretty much went straight to bed. We have around twenty hours of travel tomorrow to get back to Perth, and we're gonna spend a few hours in Nagano on the way back and go to the Zenkoji temple.

Japan Day Fifteen : Hakuba 4th day on the slopes...

This morning was looking awesome but feeling terrible.

I had slept very poorly all night. Everytime I moved, my knee hurt. After looking up the symptoms on the internet, and now becoming an expert, I have diagnosed myself with a sprained medial collateral ligament if I'm lucky. If I'm unlucky, a partial tear.

I could not fully straighten my leg without pain, and I also couldn't put weight on it while it was bent at less than 90'. Things were not feeling good.

However the snow looked amazing. Another foot last night, and no rain on the way. There was no way I was missing this. I got out to the slopes and went up a lift with Woo. My knee felt fine until I sat down to bind in my left foot. I couldn't get up without pain. Thats a problem. I didnt feel any pain while on the board going down, so I guess I was just going to learn not to stack it so often.

They had shut down the top of the mountain today due to high winds, which meant that with the good snow, good weather, weekend and half the lift running, it was stupidly busy. Me and Woo went to the other side of the mountain, but the lines were just as bad, and there's no way their green runs were actually for beginners. We did a few runs there and then came back to Sakka, where we were before and had lunch.

As expected the cafeteria was packed. I grabbed some seats while Woo got the food. A small Asian girl came back the her stuff, which she had left of the table to mark her spot as she got lunch. She looked and me, I looked at her. Then she said in a broad Australian accent "Hows it going?" I was a little surprised, to say the least. Her name is Monique, she's an ABC, (Australian Born Chinese, for anyone who's not Crispy) and lives in Melbourne. Me and Woo talked about how much we love Melbourne, which seems to be a theme whenever we meet anyone from there.

We boarded most of the afternoon together, including going up to Skyline, only to find it closed and having to come all the way back down on the stupid fucking trail that I hate. I fell over while on the trail, and landed on my ass. I'm pretty sure I ruptured my bowel. I felt like I was gonna shit myself, and if it wasn't for the fact that I was halfway up a mountain, I definitely would have made a visit to the Mens.

I finally made it back down the bottom, and did a few more runs with Monique. Woo had gone back to the hotel by this stage, although I didn't know that. I got back to the hotel and found him at the bar. Apparently he had a mega stack and heard his neck click and then decided that it was a good idea for him to call it a day.

We went out to a pub called "The Pub" that night. There was some sort of "fire festival" on, but it was just a few fireworks and some people skiing down the slopes at night. We didn't go out in the cold, instead we stayed in the warmth while Woo did doubles of whatever he was drinking and got himself well nailed. Kirsty and Josh found him most amusing, especially while we were waiting for a bus to take us back to our hotel at 1:30am. It was called the "party bus", but when it showed up, it was basically just a Tarago. They did give us a lift back to our hotel though, and thats all that matters.

Japan Day Fourteen : Hakuba 3rd day on the slopes...

Today was a bad day for PandaHat. A very bad day indeed.

In discussions last night with a few staff, we were told that this season in Hakuba is the worst snow season (as in amount of snow) for 37 years. However I woke up this morning to see another good foot of fresh powder and was very excited to be able to go out and board for another day without the fear of stacking it and bashing into some ice.

With Pandahat on my head, I got to the slopes, only for it to start RAINING! Fuck that. It's not supposed to rain at the snow. Pandahat is very fluffy and hence was just soaking up all the water, so for most of the day I wore my hood over the top. Although when I put it on after I went in for lunch, i did get some interested stares from all the nearby kids.

My boarding is getting much better, and unless I am trying 360's, I can get all the way down the run without coming close to stacking it.

Except one time this morning, when I was looking for Woo, who was supposed to be on one of the runs. I saw him working his way down the run from the chair lift, but we kept missing each other so I was trying to get down the run as fast as I could to catch him. I did this a few times and was gradually catching him. On about my third fast run, I was cracking along, and looking up to the chair lift to try to see where Woo was and my front end dug in. I kid you not when I say that I would have flown for good four metres before cartwheeling three times, bending my knee in a way it's not supposed to go in the process. I lay in the soft snow and laughed to myself as it was such a massive stack and I was very lucky there was soft fresh snow.

I came back to the hotel at about 2pm as I was soaked through and freezing my tits off. Woo decided to stay, as he was improving massively and wanted to stay out there and work on it.

By the time Woo got home, he had sorted turning on his toes and was very pleased with himself. We discussed injuries and techniques before goint out to dinner at a bar called 'Marzen'. We chatted to the bar man, who's name was Kim. Kim is from Adelaide and speaks nearly fluent Japanese. He's over here for a season and to see a bit of stuff, earn some money, get his accomodation paid for and get snow snowboarding practice in.

By the end of the night, my knee was feeling pretty average and we went in for an early night. It was snowing, and barring any stupid rain tomorrow, it was gonna be a good day!

Japan Day Thirteen : Hakuba 2nd day on the slopes....

I woke up feeling a little worse for wear, but upon looking outside and seeing about ten inches of fresh snow, I felt a lot better.

Had my breakfast and said goodbye to Dawesy and Kell. They were off to Tokyo and Woo and I had given them very specific instructions of where was good and what they should try to check out. After getting my gear together, it was out to the mountain again.

Josh, whom Woo had nicknamed 'Gigantor', had offered to give Woo a lesson the next morning, so we went out with him and his girlfriend Kirsty. Unfortunately they kinda weren't thinking when they jumped on the big lift, and now me and Woo were halfway up the mountain and nowhere near any wide beginner runs. We only had the trail to go back down, and while it's a very shallow decline, its only the width of a road, and has a sheer dropoff on one side. Not the place you want to be when you are just learning. Woo did quite well before he cracked it again and picked up his board. I went off down the hill and did a few runs before I saw him at the bottom again.

We did another run, and Woo barely fell over at all, but his muscles were sore from all the constant stiffness, so he decided to call it a day and head back to the hotel. I stayed out to keep practicing my carving. I kept going until about 2pm, but then started to feel as if I was actually getting worse. I was ready to go home myself, however decided to dtay out due to the amazing powder still on offer. I wasn't sure if we'd get another night of snow this good, hence I didn't want to waste it. I did quite a few more runs and was carving without any problems, so I decided to try a new run. It meant going up a really long chair lift, then I would be doing an intermediate, that would later turn into a beginner and then back onto the slope I was used to.

I got up to the top of the run and every sphincter I have puckered up. The red (intermediate) run did not look this steep from below. I actually had to walk around a bit and take out a map, as I was sure this was too steep to be intermediate, but alas, it was the correct run and it was my only way down. I strapped in and headed off extremely slowly, in fact, I did the whole run in incredibly slow leaf style. I was scary as shit and I was tense the whole way, but I got down with no problems. Once I got back to the green run, I was apples and carved my way down to the bottom and got on the bus to come back to the hotel. I later spoke to one of the guys who snowboards in Europe a lot, and apparently that would be a Black run in Europe. Holy Crap!

I got home and Woo was reading my book, which is not entirely suprising as I'd been going on about how good it is all holiday. We had a fairly quiet dinner with the Melbourne crew, who all leave tomorrow and then retired early so we can rest our weary bodies. My glutes, coccyx and neck are all particularly sore, and I'm nearly out of Voltaren gel.

Japan Day Twelve : Hakuba 1st day on the slopes....

We got down to the restaurant at 8am for our included breakfast. It's the only place on the holiday where we've got the breakfast, and it's awesome. We would have never been up in time for the breakfasts as other places, so it would have been a waste of money, but being as we're planning on being out on the slopes by 9am, a decent feed is important.

Woo and I got to the ski school where we were informed that they dont do English beginner lessons from that location. We had to catch another bus to the other side of the mountain. Being as Woo and I had both done a day snowboarding at Mt Buller about 2 years ago, we decided to have a crack at it on one beginner slope before we schlepped ourselves all over the mountain for a lesson.

We went up, and as expected, we both stacked it coming off the lift. I managed to remember what to do from last time fairly quickly, and was soon leafing down the run. Woo however had started back at square one, not entirely surprising, as it was ages ago we went to Buller, and he's never skated. So he picked up his bat an ball and went home (by that I mean he picked up his board, walked the rest of the way down the run, and went to find the bus to take him to his lesson).

I stayed on the slopes, and within a few runs was already better than I was at the end of the last time I was at the snow. I had the whole leafing thing pretty sorted, and now felt I could get down the run without falling easily, hence I started trying to turn on my toes. When you leaf, you stay looking down the hill the whole time, turning on your toes requires you to have your back facing down the hill. Bit more scary, and I'm shit at it, but you have to be able to turn on either side of your body to look like a proper snowboarder.

I was really enjoying this alone time out in the beautiful snow with my iPod playing my favourite tracks. Although it did irritate me that every time I stacked (which was reasonably often) at least one of my ear pods would fall out. Then I couldn't put it back in til I got back down the bottom, as it required taking my glove off. I soon worked that I would get the most out of my day if I dealt with that sort of shit (and cleaning goggles etc) while I was sitting around on the chair lift.

After a few hours of this, I went back to the original run, as I was going to take a different lift and go try out another run. There I found Woo and one of the girls from last night, Kelli. Woo had gotten to the other place 15min late for a lesson, but he had found wrist guards, so he was feeling a little better. He still had no confidence, and Kelli was probably a little better than me, so we all went out together. Woo showed steady signs of improvement throughout the day, but his posture was very stiff, which puts a lot of strain on your muscles. I was still doing mega stacks trying to toe turn. While snowboarding, the worst thing you can do is catch your front edge in the snow. It stops your board dead, yet your body keeps going forward, sending you flying through the air, most likely faceplanting the snow. It is affectionately known as a "Superman". I did this a few times, it's not the most fun. If you catch you front edge while turning on your toes, hence your back is facing down the hill, you perform what is known as a "backwards Superman". I did the hugest backwards superman this afternoon. I must have flown about eight metres before landing on my back and sliding for another twenty.

By the end of the day however, Woo could get down a run without stacking it, and I had my toe turns mostly sorted. A very successful day all in all.

We got back to the hotel and had a few drinks. Jeremy was serving at the bar, and he is awesome. If you ask for a bourbon and coke, he keeps pouring the bourbon til you tell him to stop, hence me and Woo got fairly toasted off three drinks. We met up with the crew from last night. They were going out o dinner and it was Kelli and Dawesy's last night there. We went to a little restaurant down the hill that brings you out all the raw stuff and you cook it yourself in a hotplate at your table. It was delicious, but i did smell a lot like barbeque. Tonight was also the first night that Pandahat made an appearance. Sara gave me a warm hat that looks like a panda head to wear while at the snow, and I wore it out with the crew, which they found very amusing.

After a nice meal, a few of the boys ran over the road to grab some beers, but they came back with about three shopping bags full of beer. By the time we got back to the hotel it had been snowing for hours and everything was covered. We stayed up drinking in the common room til about 11pm, once venturing outside for a drunken snowball fight (which was fucken awesome fun) before going back to our room to continue drinking with a couple of the folks. not entirely such a good idea, as it meant I had nowhere to go when I wanted to go to sleep, but it was a really good night with a completely new and random bunch of people, so the fact that I didn't get to sleep til 2am didn't bother me so much.

And it was gonna snow all night and I was really looking forward to tomorrow!

Japan Day Eleven : Travelling to Hakuba....

I think my body had forgotten how to fall asleep. It only knows how to pass out.

Woo and I had an extremely quiet night, but neither of us was able to sleep. I woke up at 7am, after getting maybe two hours, Woo continued to sleep til 8:40.

We packed up the room, which still looked as if there was a grenade detonated in there (i feel sorry for the little Japanese housekeeper who would have to deal with it). Checked out of the hotel, fought our way through thousands of people at the Osaka train station and finally made it to Shin-Osaka to catch the shinkansen to Nagoya. We changed to a standard train there, and headed up into the countryside. It was very beautiful, and had been snowing in parts. We arrived into Nagano, and it was freaking cold. Seriously cold. We then jumped the bus up to Hakuba and to our hotel where we would be for the next 6 days.

We got our hire gear sorted and we now have everything needed to start the snowboarding part of our trip. It feels like ages go we arrived in Tokyo, as it was a completely different world to what we have now. There are Aussies everywhere, and very few Japanese.

We had to go into town on the shuttle, and met up with a few Aussies while waiting for the bus. They were going out for one of their mates 25th birthdays. We tagged along with them. It was a really fun night. Most of them have all met each other on the mountain. It's a big change from the last 9 days where we have nearly completely avoided Gaijin.

But, unlike the last week, I maintained my self control and am back in my hotel room before 11pm. Woo is still downstairs drinking with a few folk, but I'm sure he'll be fine. Well maybe....

I hit the slopes tomorrow. My goal is to not do an injury, as there will be four more days of snowboarding to follow...

Japan Day Ten : Recovery and Washing...

What just happened? Seriously.

Woo and I dragged ourselves up and out of bed at around 1pm. The bender was over. NO amound of motivation was getting us out again tonight. And neither of us had any clean clothes, so today was a day that would be dedicated to doing our washing. I had been given a map by the hotel to a nearby laundromat (they call them Coin Laundries over here), but it was in Japanese.

I got lost in the area surrounding the laundromat, before asking a local gentleman, and he was nice enough to help me find it. The washing took ages, and we were worried that we were being very rude by using three washers and then three dryers at once.

After the washing was done we went out for teppanyaki, which was excellent. And then decided to go back to the hotel and get ready for the second half of our holiday. The hotel room was a disaster area, so Woo cleaned it up while I wrote this.

I will never forget the last 5 days, if only I could remember them. :-P

Off to Hakuba tomorrow, where we have both made a pact that we will not be getting nailed every night. We'll see how that goes.

Japan Day Nine : Osaka Castle....

Oh holeeee Jeeeeeeeeeebus. We have got to stop doing that.

We dragged ourselves out at about 3pm and jumped on a train to see the Osaka Castle. It is right in the middle of the city, so it was just a few stops away. As we walked from the train station to the castle, there was a bunch of stuff happenning on the pedestrian walkway.

Firstly there was some lion dancers. A little girl went up to them and the lion (or dragon or whatever it is supposed to be) pretended to eat her head. Her little sister (i think) was freaking out and going absolutely nuts. Her Dad wouldn't let go of her hand, so she was cowering behind him and screaming as the dragon came towards her. It was really kinda mean, but utterly hilarious.

We then passed what seemed to be a battle of the bands type thing. There were about 4 stages, all side by side with two bands going at once, belting out their j-pop and causing a wall of noise. There were street vendors set up everywhere and quite a fun atmosphere around. Osaka reminds me a lot of Melbourne.

The Osaka Castle is very pretty and really impressive. It's behind two moats and very high walls. It sits much higher than the land around it, so it looks over Osaka city. It and the Golden Temple are probably the most impressive historical stuff I have done in Japan.

After we'd finished looking through the castle, which is a museum of Japanese and Osakan history on the inside. We headed back to the hotel, and discussed whether we were going to go out again tonight. In the end, we were both shattered, but decided to just go out for a few drinks, and be back reasonably early. We agreed that we would go to bars, but would not be going to any clubs.

We got to Zerro in Shinsaibashi at around 10pm. We were sitting next to a completely maggoted Canadian couple who were consistently sloppily making out with each other and making smacky smacky noises while doing so. I was nearly ready to leave and call it a night, but Woo decided we needed tequila shots. After we bombed them and another beer, the Canadians had gone, but we decided to go back to Cinquecento, where we had been the night before. We stayed there for a few drinks (including a Jagerbomb, which was Woo's idea also) and were beginning to push a little towards drunk.

When we left Cinquecento we really should have headed home, however we decided we would go to Sam and Daves, which is a club. I know this goes aganst a decision we had made only 3 hours earlier, but hey, thats just how we roll. Sam and Daves is apparently pretty rocking on a sunday night. We walked past some other club, and Woo decided we should try it out. It was 1000yen entry but you got a free drink. We went down into the basement where the club was and it was completely dead. We decided we would get our free drink, bomb it in one shot, then walk out. We figured this would be appropiately rude enough to let them know how unhappy we were with being charged 1000yen to enter an empty club. We bombed the drinks and left. Woo had ordered a Pina Colada, so he got to bomb that, while I simply had a bourbon and coke. We laughed ourselves silly as we drunkenly made our way to sam and daves.

It was 2000yen entry but you got two free drinks. We walked in and it had maybe thirty people inside. We got our free drinks and kept drinking. It had started to fill up a little and we started talking to (and buying drinks for) some girls at the bar. By this stage we were both completely leathered, so I dont remember their names. I do remember both me and woo dropping our drinks at some point, and not long after that I think the girls decided that two completely maggot gaijin are probably a bit too much effort. We decided to leave and got back to the hotel at around 3am.

If I could do anything other than just pass out, I'm sure I would have wondered how that night had just happened. We had just had a five day bender through three different Japanese cities.

Japan Day Eight : Kyoto Temples and Osaka....

Day Eight began quite early for Woo and I. Being as we got home from Nap at 4:30am, the fact that we were awake, packed up, and checked out of the hotel by 10am was very surprising. We were meeting Dennis and Michael at the Kyoto International Manga Museum at 10am, so we were late, but not as late as expected.

We were up and out of bed, but I was still so busted ass I fell up the stairs coming out of the subway station. Not as bad as Woo's massive stack down some stairs the night before while drunk out of his gord, but a stack nonetheless. While I'm talking about stacks, Dennis also had a doozy. Last night was raining and the pavements are quite slippery, so I was running along the pavement, and sliding along (on my feet of course) for a few metres before coming to a stop. I'd been doing it between a few bars when we were on the slippery pavement and was finding myself rather amusing (and awesome). Dennis decided not to let me have all the fun after we came out of some boring pub and had a giant failure. He found out that pavement defeats hips and ass every time. Funny shit, but I saved him the embarrassment of taking a photo of him while he was on his ass. Woo didn't get the same treatment, hence I have a photo of him, lying on his back in a stairwell.

Anyway, so the Manga museum would have been awesmome if any of the maga was in english, or if I wasn't hungover like a mule. I just didn't have the brain power fot it, but at a different time it might have been good. It's really more like a library, as people we coming in, sitting on couches and just grabbing one of the millions of different manga books and having a read.

After that we grabbed some food and decided that while in Kyoto we needed to see at least one temple. We went to the Golden temple, which was (gold) very pretty and had a lovely garden around it. Then to the one with the big rock garden, but the rock garden was not as big as I had been led to believe. Both were good, but so touristy and commercialised, that it definitely took away from the peacefulness of the place.

On the bus when we came back to central Kyoto from the temples, I thought I was being very prepared with my coin at the ready to pay my 220yen fare. I only had a 500yen coin, but in all the other machines, this is no problem. Unfortunately, the machine on the bus only gives change in 10yen coins. And it's slow. And you pay when you get off. And as the driver operates the machine manually, he cant go anywhere until its done. So a packed bus got to sit there and hear Woo, Dennis and Michael laughing themselves silly and the "tink, tink, tink..." as twenty eight 10yen coins came out of the machine. Maybe 1 coin every 3 seconds, however it felt like an hour. With every subsequent "tink", Woo, Michael and Dennis would erupt into laughter again. I'm sorry Japanese commuters. I tried.

We then jumped on the Shinkansen and took the 14 minuted train trip to Osaka. Osaka and Kyoto are basically the same city. Like Joondalup and Perth, there is no area btween them which isn't built up. It's dense housing the whole way.

Osaka train station with suitcases and so forth at 5pm on a Saturday night is not fun. Well, it is a little bit fun, but it's a lot nuts. Fucking great big piles of nuts. I could tell I was gonna like this place, and after checking in at our hotel and cleaning up, we would be ready to do it all over again. This time, Osaka style.

Dennis and Michael got to our hotel at 8pm, and after it was Me and Woo that had dragged them down to Osaka, we felt a little pressure to make sure they had a good night. Dennis didn't seem the most excited to be here, but Michael seemed pretty pumped as we headed out to grab some food in Osaka.

We started out into the night by bumbling our way through grabbing a ticket for the subway. Hardly any signage in Osaka is in English, so it's a little more difficult than Tokyo or Osaka. Jon (the dude who busted my nose) had hooked us up with a friend of his named Keith, who told us to go out in an area known as Nagahori-bashi. After getting my subway ticket, I turned around to find Woo talking to a bunch of mid-twenties Japanese dudes. They were very friendly, and asked us where we were heading out tonight, and told us where the were going. It was a very amusing, broken english converstaion. One that would be unlikely to happen in Tokyo.

We got off the station and walked to the area we were supposed to be going, we then walked around a bit till we found some Japnese writing, with the word "bar" in English. We all strolled in and the current customers looked as if I had just taken a dump on their chest. The Gaijin had broken their lovely evening, even though we were being very quiet and respectful. I actually think we were moire uncomfortable being there than they where having us there. It was a sake bar, and in hindsight, maybe a restaurant too. We each got one drink each, and they brought us out this tofu dish which was quite nice, however we did not order it. We then asked for the check, which was 6100yen (thats about $120).

We then managed get hold of Keith, and we met him outside a department store. He's from Edinburgh, and has lived in Osaka for the last 3 years.

Keith took us to a bar, I cant remember the name of it, but it had written on the blackboard out the front "a tribute to the word fucking". Oh - kay. We had a few drinks there, spoke to a few ex-pats and a few locals. Osaka people are definitely more alternative than those from Tokyo or Kyoto. More black clothing, less heels, way more tattoos and a more friendly and open personality.

Keith then took us to another bar that we would never have found on our own. We walked in and it had all bondage and porn stuff on the screens. Like "artsy" porn, just still images, no nasty close ups or anything. The bar was tiny. Maybe two metres by 8 metres. All the seats were at th bar, and they were all taken when we got there, so we were pretty much just standing against the back wall, although only a metre back from the bar.

Keith says he needs a volunteer, I figured we would be drinking something new and evil, so I pipe up. He then hands me a microphone as Oasis's Wonderwall comes on. We were in the most random Karaoke bar I'd ever seen. I sung Wonderwall incredibly poorly, and then all others got on the bandwagon. Seeing this Japanese dude belt out AD/DC's Highway to Hell was one of the funier moments of my trip. Michael did more than words, which reminded me of Belle, as that is one of her all time favourite Karaoke songs. Dennis had certainly perked up by the time he busted out some NWA old school for the locals. Me and Woo cranked out Eye of the Tiger later on in the evening after eveybody else had sung.

We then headed off to another bar, after me and Michael had a wrestle in the hallway outside the Karaoke. No blood noses this time, which was a pleasant change. The bar we got to was packed to the rafters but we managed to get a seat in the corner of the bar. The bar girls were wearing shirts that said "I made you all wet but my martini is still dry". One of them had an absolutely dynamite tattoo that went around her lower back and down her pelvis. Hot. Blow my mind hot.

We managed to get hooked up with this group of white girls from Melbourne. We all went to the next bar together, this was the bar Woo walked into and immediately bought a round for the entire bar. Probably about 10 people. He was wondering how he managed to drop 30000yen last night until he remembered that moment.

We ditched the white girls at about 4am and Keith took us to a club. Earlier in the night, Keith had told us to be aware of th south american contingent, and if they do anything, just say "sumimasen" and move away.

Keith left us at the entrance to the club and went home. We all went in and the place was jumping. I found a spot in a corner and sat down for a bit, after about 5 minutes I was ready to keep kicking on, bur Dennis and Michael had somehow got the impression that the club was full of south americans and wanted to leave. I dont remember any, but to be honest, I dont remember much.

We got home after Woo had stopped at a convenience store and bought noodle cups and chip etc. Woo passed out not too long after Dennis met Buddha's friend, Chunder in the bathroom. Michael and I did our best to irritate Woo as he was trying to remain passed out on his bed. It was the third night in a row he had passed out before even getting under his covers.

I woke up thee hours later. Michael had gone. I must've passed out in mid-conversation. Poor Michael. Dennis was still passed out in the bathroom, but he woke up and headed back to hit hotel, before they would get back on the shinkansen and return to Tokyo.

Like I said before, Osaka is nuts. Great big, awesome, crazy Japanese nuts.

Japan Day Seven : Kyoto Imperial Palace....

Day seven began very late as Woo kept falling asleep. I woke up to the housekeeper coming into the room, seeing woo in his y-fronts and socks passed out on top of the cover, and freaking out.

At around noon we left the hotel. We went to the Kyoto Imperial Palace, where the emporer used to live before the capital moved to Tokyo. It was very impressive, but you could only see it with a guided tour, which sucked a lot of time.

After that finished Woo and I walked through the Nishiki food markets. I think we both said the words "thats so random" about 1ooo times. So much so that after this, no Australian random can possibly come close to the random we have experienced in Japan.

After that we walked around for a while, soaking up Kyoto until we came back to the hotel and started having a few bourbons. We were interrupted by a knock at the door from Dennis and Michael. They had come back from their day trip to Hiroshima, and had returned to go out on the town with us once again

We hit up a bunch of bars, some good, some bad, some average. But all in all it was a good night. I'm not going to write any more detail about tonight as;
a) I dont really remember that much.
b) I'm tired and I want to go to sleep
c) Woo is snoring like a motherfucker.

In a nutshel it went gayagaya, temus, random bar, voodoo, freeball (shithouse) and Nap. All good fun, but I get an epic failure for my Japanese skills, and as we all know, girls only want guys who have mad skills.

Japan Day Six : Shinkansen to Kyoto...

Day six began very early (ie - about 2am) with Woo complaining of a massive headache. It seems the "Kirin Strong -It hits you in the mind" joke was more than just a metaphor. But after a few Advil, Woo went back to sleep an continued snoring as usual.

We got up at about 9ish and packed all our shit and so forth for check out at 11. We went to the train station and got our tickets for the shinkansen (bullet train). It was due to leave at 12:10, so we got some food (which took a little longer than expected as we couldn't decide where to eat) and ended up missing our train. Lucky we hada JRail pass and all our train travel was included. We went to the ticket office and apologised profusely (in English, of course). At that piont we didn't know that gomennasai was the Japanese word for sorry. We know now as we have had a few more moments to use it, and have since looked it up.

We go on the shinkansen and headed off towards Kyoto. The shinkansen is very quiet, and you dont really notice how fast it is going. I really loved the trip, especially when we went past Mt Fuji. Both me and Woo were standing in the doorways taking photo's for the whole time you had a good view of Fuji-san. All the other passengers seemed completely apathetic, but I guess thats how you get when you are completely used to something.

The Japanese countryside is absolutely beautiful. The wooded hills surround densly populated plateaus, all the way from Tokyo to Kyoto. In the middle of the city, it con sometimes be easy to forget where you are. It could be any high ride area of Sydney or Melbourne (not Perth), but travelling through the country it is abundantly clear that this could only be Japan. So much so that I nearly expect to see a clan of Samurai charging over one of the hills and rumbling across the field.

But alas, no Samurai. We got to Kyoto and walked the short distance to check in at the New Miyako Hotel. Our room is significantly biggr than in Tokyo and we have free internet. Both of which is very pleasing.

We went back into Kyoto to grab some food. At most of the restaurants in Japan they have buzzers that you press when your want to get the staffs attention. Woo must not have been paying attention to this, as after we had ordered our meal, he asked "whats this" and pressed the buzzer. Aftr hearing the buzzing nse, and seeing the waitress come out to us he realise what it was. Another occasion for us to say sorry.

We then walked into the city side of Kyoto, where we could go up the Kyoto tower and have a look around. While looking fr where to go up the towere, wo beckoned at me to follow him into a building, whi I did without thinking, walking straight across the footpath, I heard a strange sound. I had walked out directly in frnt of an old dude on a pushbike, and he had basically locked it up to avoid hitting me. All the while I was just dopily walking across his path, staring at a smoking hottie in a white coat. I scurried quickly into the building while Woo chuckled loudly.

At the top of the tower you could see all over Kyoto, they had free floor mounted binoculars to look out at the various sites around the area such as shrines, castles and the like. They had the names of the sites and the distance to each site on a sticker on the window, through which you could see the sites when looking through the binoculars. I figured this out pretty quickly, Woo didn't. He later admitted that he kept himself amused by looking into peoples windows with the binoculars to see if they were having sex.

We headed back to the hotel to see where we would like to go out tonight. Woo bought some "Nikka Whisky" and coke and we planned on having few drinks before going out. We got a call from Dennis, letting us know that he and Michael would be coming to our room before we all go out. Woo got housekeeping to show him where the ice was, and at my request, he answered the door wearing a headbad typr thing he found in the hotel drawer. I dont think the hotel clerk quite knew what was so funny. Then we spent the time waiting for Dennis and Michael to get to the hotel drinking and discussing religion after Woo found the treachings of Buddha in the drawer next to his bed.

In the end, Dennis and Michael didn't come to our hotel room so we headed into Kyoto to meet them at Oike Station.

Woo and I jumped on the Kyoto subway, even though we were fairly sure that our JR pass didn't allow us subway in Kyoto. And, as we expected, we were caught out for the transit guard at Oike station and we had to pay our fare.

We then followed Dennis to a Sake bar he had read about in the Kyoto visitors magazine. We found it with the help of a little old lady, whom Dennis gave a small furry Kangaroo for her troubles. The sake bar was run by an Isreali immigrant who had lived in Japan for the last 13 years. The sake was awful (I hate the stuff, but i'm sure some people like it) but the conversation was fantastic. It was one of those quintessential Japanese experiences that you dream about. After that (about 11pm) we headed into the night club/ bar area of Kyoto. We found a little bar called Voodoo Noise Bar and went inside. We quickly struck up a conversation with the barman (Adsu) and a girl at the bar (Yumi). Yumi worked at Voodoo some nights, but tonight she was just there drinking. They had a fooseball table downstairs and Woo challenged many Japanese fooseball heros to game (and lost all of them). We had a fantastic time there until leaving at around 2am and heading off looking for something else.

We then entered another little bar. Fuck knows what it was called. But Woo and I struck up a conversation with two girls at the bar named Hiyako and Yu. They were lots of fun, and despite the major language barrer, we managed to get drunk together and take the piss out of each other. Finally at around 4:30, all decided it was time to call it a night, and we all headed home.

A night of desperately trying to understand a language you have absolutely no idea of can be very tiring.

Japan Day Five : Yokohama and Japan Vs Aus World Cup Qualifier...

Alright, so Day five was to be the day in Yokohama, culminating in the Australia Vs Japan soccer world cup qualifier.

It was very nearly a disaster of biblical proportions.

We slept in til about ten, as we didn't really have anywhere to be and took our time getting up and ready to go to Yokohama. I took pictures on Woo's new camera of all the Yokohmama maps and info in the lonely planet, and then we headed out.

The tickets said the game was at Yokohama stadium. The lonely planet put Yokohama stadium next door to Kannai station. It all seemed very easy.

We decided to get off the train at Yokohama station, which is two stops before Kannai, and walk down through Yokohama to the stadium. There seems to have been loads of development over the past 10-15 years as there are lots of very new buildings and construction going on.

We walked past a little amusement park, kinda like Luna park I guess. But as it was the middle of winter, the rollercoaster was not in use. However there were people getting in the log water rapids rides. It was about 9'C and there was people wearing long overcoats and high heels etc getting in a water ride. Crazy Japanese!!

We continued down to the stadium. It looked like it was mostly used for Baseball, which was a bit concerning, but there was a soccer pitch set up in the middle so we were not too concerned. It was definitely Yokohama stadium.

Next to the stadium is Chinatown. This is a real Chinatown. Its probably about as big as all of northbridge and there were people everywhere. Day five (Feb 11) was "Emperor's day" which is Japans equivalent of Australia Day.

In the city areas of Tokyo, expecially in the seedy or trendy areas, you will often see young men, dressed all in black with crazy manga style hair, standing on street corners and talking to pretty girls as they wait to cross the street. These guys are trying to convince the girls to go into the bar that these guys get paid by. Apparently a wealthy businessman will pay 10000yen a drink if he gets to talk to a pretty girl while he's there. Anyway, you see it happening all over. Most of the girls just ignore them. Others chat a little then walk off. Either way, it seems like everyone just accepts it.

Anyway, so we're walking into Chinatown and Woo see's these three Japanese dudes all dressed in black and assumes that they are trolling for girls. Then one of them beckons to him. More than a little surprised Woo stops to talk to him, and then notices his Japan scarf around his neck. Woo was wearing his Socceroos beanie all day yesterday. So we have photo's of two japanese dudes and two Aussie dudes, all screaming and showing their colours, at the entrance to Chinatown.

We walked through Chinatown for an hour or so, taking photo's, eating a steamed pork bun (yummy) and then we decided we wanted to stop for a drink. We knew most of the aussie fans we meeting at a place called "Cafe Bar Funky" which as supposed to be walking distance to the stadium, but we had no idea where it was. The address said "liberty building, shinyokohama".

It was getting fucking cold by this stage, so Woo and I went to find a shopping area to buy some gloves. After that, we found a nice bar and stopped in for a drink. There, Woo struck up a conversation with another customer who spoke decent English, and we found out that Shinyokohama was another suburb, probably 20 minutes away from where we were.

What to do? We knew where the stadium was. Why would they meet at a place so freaking far away from the ground? Although, we still had three hours before kick-off, also we were supposed to be meeting Michael and Dennis at the bar. Hence we decided to make the trip.

We waited at the train station for about ten minutes, but never got a green line train, hence we decided to try something different and use the Subway. We walked down the road and around the corner to the subway station and jumped on a train.

It was eight stops to Shin-Yokohama station. We got off the train and went up the the concourse and there were people everywhere. Japanese wearing blue and Aussies in their green and gold as far as you can see. At this point, Woo and I are still thinking "those poor bastards, they dont realise they've got to go another 20 minutes to get to the stadium" So much so that when a group of Aussies asked us where the stadium was, we told them to go back downstairs, get on the subway, go eight stops till you get to Kannai, then the stadium is right there. They kinda looked at us blankly (and more than a little irritated) and said "No, I think we'll just follow the crowd". No worries fellas, we said was he ran off to try to find this bar. We saw a map on the next street corner which showed "Nissan International Stadium". A designated specific soccer pitch.

Crap. We had been at the wrong stadium the whole time. he lonely planet map didn't even have the suburb of Shinyokohama in is. And as there was a Yokohama stadium on the map, we had never even entertained the thought that it was anywhere else.

So, we stopped an Aussie and found out where cafe bar funky was. When we got there they had run out of beer, and the were about 500 aussies on the street corner out front. Drinking the alcohol they had bought from the convenience store over the road. Wo couldn't find Dennis and Michael anywhere, so we grabbed the last four Kirin Strongs (it hits you in the mind) and headed off to the stadium, following the massive aussie crowd.

Halfway to the stadium, Dennis tapped me on the shoulder. They had found us. Woo then went into another convenience store and bought another bag full of Kirin Strongs. We continued to the stadium, along the way Woo bought a Japan scarf and started hanging shit on a Manchester scarf that the vendor was selling. The (probably drunk) Japanese man next to him agreed. When Woo stated he went for Liverpool, this man screamed his agreeance, and it now became clear that Woo had found his long lost Japanese brother as they sang, danced, hugged and screamed together all the way to the stadium. The Japanese dude had two friends that walked behind with us, laughing their asses off at his craziness, the same way we were laughing at Woo.

By the time we got to the stadium we were all very drunk. There were Japanese dudes on megaphones telling people where to go in Japanese. We tried to get one to say "Aussie Aussie Aussie" through the megaphone. But he wouldn't. It was business use only apparently. So we went to the next one. He said it, we yelled "Oi Oi Oi", laughed our asses off, then tried to shake his hand, but he didn't want a bar of it. He looked very unhappy with us and wanted to continue his work. We then went up to another dude, probably the youngest of the lot. He happily screamed "Aussie Aussie Aussie" into the magaphone and we belted out our "Oi Oi Oi". Then we had high fives and handshakes all round, and headed into the stadium on quite a high.

The game was excellent. I was disappointed that there were no goals scored, but an away draw pretty much seals Australias berth into the 2010 world cup finals.

Woo was mega drunk for our trip home and decided that this was his opportunity to talk to anyone wearing a Japan scarf about the game, about Japanese players, about how much he loved their country and how hot their women were.

All in all a fucken hilarious trip home, and a marvelous day. One that could have ended with us wondering where the fuck everybody was as we sat outside an empty Yokohama stadium.

Japan Day Four : Imperial Palace and Shibuya...

This morning Woo and I had planned to get up early and go to the Tokyo fish markets. When Woo woke me up at 6:30am, I just didn't have it in me to get up, dressed and out into the world at that early hour. I mean, I know they are supposed to be quite a sight (the fish markets) but thats pretty fucken early.

So we slept until 9am ish, and the got up and headed out to Tokyo. We walked from the station to the Emperial gardens and along the way grabbed breakfast. A $60 breakfast, mind you. Since the Yen has performed so strongly against the dollar over the last few months, everything is spastically expensive here now, when you convert it back.

The Imperials palace was lovely, but you cant get in, so basically we just have lots of photo's of the wall. Woo asked a guard if there was any way we could get in, and he just got ignored.

Not to far from the Palace is a fucken awesome stature of some dude, in full samurai armour on a horse. I have no idea who he is, but the statue was wicked.

We then went into Shibuya to do some shopping. We had no specific plans as to what we wanted to buy and hence the trip became a lot of walking around doing little. Or walking around marvelling at the smoking hot tail all over the place.

We went back to the hotel in Shinagawa. Walked around the area, then went up to the rooftrop bar. Drinks were 1500 yen each (about $30) but we copped that as the veiw was so impressive.

After than we headed back out to Shibuya to meet Dennis and his mate, both of whom were here for the Socceroos game tomorrow. On "Emporers Day" no less. The Japanese are gonna be fucken pissed when they lose......

We all went to a pub together and drank for a good 4 hours before the bar closed. Woo had made friends with the bartender, whose name was "Dick", which everyone found approppriately amusing. And in the end, Dick had to kick us out. Woo and I grabbed a burger before heading home. Once we got back to the hotel, Woo cracked the shits that our hotel didn't do room service (as he ws still hungry) and then went to sleep.

So, a pretty quiet day four. Day five includes the massive world cup qualifier of Japan Vs Australia, and the constant threat that Woo is gonna move here, learn the language and marry a Japanese girl.

Arigato for reading :-P

Japan Day Three: Akihabara...

Well, day three began with Woo and I trying to peice together what the fuck happened on the evening of Day two....

That took a while. When we both woke up the first time we felt okay, as we were still massively drunk. However, as the day wore on, we got less drunk and hence more hungover.

I had a little bit of trouble explaining to the housekeeping lady that we would not need our room made up today, as Woo was dead, and I was in no state to leave.

At about 3pm Woo got some motivation and made me leave the hotel. I felt surprisingly well while moving, though very nausious when statonary. I was grateful to Woo for getting me up off my ass and out of the hotel, as it would have been a wasted day otherwise.

We went to Akihabara, which is also known as tech town. Woo wanted to buy a camera, and this was the place to come. Akihabara probably has an area as big as Perth city, totally devoted to tech stuff. Awesome.

We got some food at a little Japanese place that served Gyoza (Japanese Dumplings) They were delicious, though not as good as Belle used to make.

We looked at lots of camera places, Woo finally decided on an Olympus shock proof model. And then he forced the Japanese salesman to throw in a free 8gig memory card.

Before we got to Japan we heard stories of the Vending machines. How you could buy everything from hot meals to used underwear. Well, we have yet to see any of that. They are everywhere, but they are just drinks (some have beer) and cigarettes. Although last night in Akihabara I wanted a drink, walked up to the vending machine, only to find it sold food in a can. Like peas and sausages.... in a can. hmmmmm not what I was looking for...

We walked into a little coffee shop near the train station and went to sit down at the counter, the lady informed us we needed to buy a ticket for food. There was a ticket machine near the front door, but unfortunately it was all in Japanese. Woo and I looked at each other and laughed, and then decided to meekly leave the shop.

We got back to the Hotel in Shinigawa a bit before 10pm. We thought it might be worth exploring the hotel itself, as Woo had read somewhere that it had a bowling alley.

We went to the bowling alley (which is massive. 40 lanes on each floor, and two floors...) but it was closing at ten. There was a little video game arcade there, so I had a quick go on a bongo drum game. Kind of like Guitar Hero, but you bash a drum. Very fun, and full of crazy Japanese characters and screaming voices.

We then continued to explore the hotel. It has a cinema, a few clubs. And Aquaworld. Like a mini seaworld show arena with dolphins and seals and stuff.

Then we walked North of the hotel. The opposite to where we had looked around Shinigawa on the first day while wewere waiting for check-in. It had heaps of stuff. TGI fridays, and other hotels and places to eat and drink.

We were a bit hungry by the stage, so we stopped at a place called "Outback Steakhouse". Yeah, you guessed it. An aussie themed restaraunt. It was actually pretty decent, although we didn't get a discount for being true blue aussie blokes.

Something we learned. Explore both sides of the area around your hotel. And possibly the hotel itself.....

After eating we headed back to our hotel, with the plan being to go to sleep reasonably early in order to get up and go to the famous Tokyo fish market the next morning.

I've been here a few days, and these are some things you should know about Tokyo.

The women are freaking gorgeous. You dont go 50m without seeing a smoking hottie.
There are very few bins, although the streets are very clean.
There are no public toilets, although nearly every place where you can buy food or drinks will have a toilet. Or if you are really busting, just go into Macdonalds and use theirs. Thats what we've done. The golden arches might as well be a symbol for "toilet" in Japanese.
Train system is exceptionally easy to use, it runs on time and is very clean.

Thats it for now. Sore Dewa mata (see you later)

Japan Day Two : Yoyogi Park and other drunken shenanigans

I have just woken up from probably the most random night of my life, and

{2 hours later}

Okay. I just went back to bed for a few hours.

Let me describe the scene....

My face is fucked up, if I didn't have such a flat nose, it would be broken. The little finger on my left hand is probably broken. My kuckles are bruised. My mind is bruised. Woo is lying in bed asking why he cant remember anything and complaining that he is still drunk and hungover a the same time.

Yet we both agree that what little of last night we can remember, we will never forget for as long as we live.

Tokyo is random town. And last night, and all of yesterday in fact, was the randomest of it all.

Write it in your diary folks. Sunday the 8th of February is when Surly and Woo faceplanted the great city of Tokyo, and survived to tell the parts of the story they remember.

Jon Arnold is an old friend of Belinda's. He used to work at Millner College of English in Perth with Belle. He has lived and worked in Tokyo for the last 2 years, and he was kind enough to be showing us around for the day yesterday.

We were supposed to meet him in the lobby at 10am. His phone cant call us, as it doesn't let him call international numbers. When we got out of bed at 10:30am, we were lucky enough that he understood that we were likely to be still asleep after the nuts night we had had on day one. (we went into tokyo and and then out in Shinjuku, to the seedy area know as Kubuki-Chou.... but i'll write day 1 later)

Jon initially takes us to a tower (i cant remember the name of it) but you can go up to an observation deck for free, which was good. It was a beautiful clear day, so we could see Mt Fuji in the distance, which was very impressive. The sheer size of the sprawl of Tokyo is impossible to describe, it seems to go on forever.

After that, it was around lunchtime, and we headed into Harajuku. Jon took us down this crazy little street full of shops and vendors. One shop had a sign out the front which said"No Photo - Fuck off", so of course I took a photo of that.

We went to a sushi place for lunch and beers. It was one of those conveyor belt places where your food comes around to you and you just grab whatever you like. The food was fantastic, the service was lovely and the beers were cold. Everything was going swimmingly.

After lunch we walked down to Yoyogi park to see the cosplay kids. Along the way, we stopped at a little convenience store, where we bought some beers and some "Kirin - Strong" It was a UDL type thing in a 440ml can, and was 8% alcohol. Jon told us that one his other friends had conumed them previously and when asked about them he replied "they really hit you in the mind". We would later find out just how true these words were.

There weren't really that many cosplay kids, which was a little disappointing as I was expecting to be blown away. But all the same, it was still amusing and something that is very different to what we are used to in Perth.

We then walked around the conrner where we found some street vendors and the Tokyo Rockabilly club, all dresse in black leather or skin tight black jeans, with their hair all "elvis-esque" and dancing around in a park. I have many photos and some video, which will go up on Facebook at some time, as will photo's and video of most of the following craziness.

We left the rockabillys and walked over an overpass to Jinnan (i think) where we could hear some beats thumping in the distance. Jon had told us that there is regularly a little tent set up with a DJ and some decks and some speakers and maybe 100 committed punters dancing about. At the base of the overpass was a flea market. Everybody mostly selling clothes, some watches and some tech stuff like old sega games etc etc. We didn't hang about to look at the flea market too long as we could now see where the music was coming from and it was well more than 100 people.

There was probably two thousand Japanese people, nearly all of whom were COMPLETELY off their dial. They were dancing their asses off to psy-trance happy hardcore type music that I would normally hate. It was completely unexpected. Jon had never seen it this big before, and it was completely free. We stood there, drinking our beers and watching the craziness for a good 30 minutes. There was people set up on picnic blankets at the back of the dance area, drinking wine out of the bottle and having a little bit to eat. There was a dessert wine that was in a milk carton. A cute litle Japanese girl gave (forced) Woo and I to have a drink. It was disgusting, but she was cool.

We left there thinking we'd go get some more drinks and then go back there and hang out with the munted people for a bit longer. We walked back a different way through the park. There were groups of people in the park practicing kendo, dance routines and volleyball (with no net). We were accosted by teens in crazy outfits carrying signs that said "free hugs" and then demanding hugs from us. It was kinda cute the first 3 times, then it got somewhat tiresome. Especially after Woo discovered the girls dont love being picked up while being hugged...

We got another Kirin Strong, and Sake in a jar. The sake was dis-gust-ing. I dont see me drinking any of that again. When we got back to the day-rave, they were all packing up. All the punters were cleaning up after themselves and heading off. It was 4:15 in the afternoon, and most looked as though they hadn't slept all weekend.

Jon, Woo and I then walked into Shibuya. We were all fairly drunk at this stage and were having a great old time. We crammed all three of us into a passport photo box before we realised that the machine would not give us change. We weren't prepared to pay $15 for the photo, so we moved on. We played some video games at a timezone type place. It all starts getting very hazy about here, but I do remember shooting tarantulas.

I stopped at a tshirt shop and bought two t-shirts. I say that so matter of factly because that kinda how it went. I walked into the store. Saw the shirts. Tried them on. Paid for them. Walked out. Shopping while drunk is a little different.

We got into Shibuya and walked across what is probably the busiest pedestrian crossing in the world. It was mind boggling the amount of people walking across it.

We went somewhere for dinner. I didn't remember even going there until Woo reminded me of it this morning. The food was good, we had to take our shoes off and they gave us thongs to wear when we went to the toilet. Thats pretty much all I remember.

After coming out of the restaurant, very drunk, we had to cross the intersection again. I asked Woo to "ebb and flow" across the intersection. Obviously he was more than happy to do so, and we have video of that momentus piece of history also. For those of you who dont know what the ebb and flow is, it is a special Woo dance that he will show your if you ask him nicely while he is drunk.

We jumped in a taxi and went back to Jon's place. Grabbing more beers along the way. Jons apartment is slightly bigger than our hotel room (ie tiny) but is was beautiful from the roof where you could see straight to the tokyo tower which was only 150m away. It looks just like the Eiffel Tower, but apparently the Japanese built it 10m taller than the Eiffel to piss of the French. Gotta love that!

We then got back in a taxi and went to a club Jon knew of called "The Room". It was nearly 10pm and the place closed at 11pm, but it was still worth it. We got in there, and it was like ambar, ie underground and small, But WAY smaller. Maybe a quarter the size. The music was pretty woeful, and i've heard monkeys mix beats better than whoever was on the decks that night.

The place was great though, the staff were friendly, especially one dude after Woo decided it would be a good idea to kiss his hand after he gave us our drinks. I hope he doesn't consider that standard Australian behaviour. We talked to a few people in the club and had a bit of a boogie before they were getting ready to close. We were the last people to leave, and I'm pretty sure we had three or four rounds of drinks in the hour we were there. Before we left we had some tequila shots with the bar staff and headed out.

Now things get hazy. Really hazy. Jon and I were playfighting a little and that continued as we crossed a road towards a convenience store. We started actually fighting out the front of the store. Neither of us were angry, it was all just a bit of fun. At this time we lost Woo, although neither of us noticed as we were laughing our asses off while wailing on each other. I was working the body for a while, before Jon took it up a notch and Jon socked me a beauty right in the schnoz. Blood was pissing out all over the pavement. I was laughing my ass off, and the next thing I know there were four cops around us, and they were curious as to why we were fighting. We didn't really have an answer but once they knew we were friends they seemed more confused than angry, although they did write all our details down. Jon says we kinda got arrested, but they didn't take us away anywhere so it's all good as far as I'm concerned.

We couldn't find Woo anywhere, so Jon and I jumped in a taxi. I dropped him home and then I went back to the hotel. I got in at about 1am, and Woo was nowhere to be seen, so I went to sleep.

Woo got in at about 4:30am, and went straight to sleep. When we discussed what happened this morning, Woo has no recollection of ever leaving the club. In fact, the last thing he remembers is kissing the bartenders hand. The next thing he remembers is walking around an apartment buildings carpark, where a ferrari f430, a lamborghini 4wd and a merc slk where parked all around him. For an inordinately long period of time Woo walked around the carpak trying to get out, but couldn't. Apparently the lift would not let him out on any floor. Eventually he got to the lobby, walked out the front door and got in a taxi which drove him around for ages before returning him to his hotel.

So that was the night. I have so many RDI's I wouldn't even know where to start. Apparently Jons abdomen is black (I was working the body, remember....) Woo cant remember how he got in that garage, and I may have a broken nose and finger.

However, it would be one of the most memorable nights of my life. Well, what I can remember of it anyway.

Japan Day One: The arrival in Tokyo...

After checking into the hotel we decided to jump a train and make our way into Tokyo and get ourselves lost.

We managed to buy ourselves a ticket for the train and got on the right train. We were very impressed with our public transport skills.

We got off the train at Tokyo station and had a chioce to make. Would we go out the Yaesu exit or the Marunouchi exit. I had Marunouchi and Woo had Yaesu. We paper, scissors, rocked for it, best of three, and nearly ran into a billboard while we were playing. Woo, and the Yaesu exit won.

We exited the station and to be honest, it was not what I expected. It was kinda bland actually, but we walked further away from the train station and eventually came across some people. As we continued to walk, we found more and more people and soon we were fairly sure we'd found a happening area. We were in Ginza, whichwe would later find out is Tokyo's version of New Yorks 5th Avenue. Bvlgari, louis Vuitton and such alluded to this also. The main street was closed to vehicles and there were people everywhere.

After walking around for a while, continually turning to each other and saying "We're in Tokyo!!" Woo and I decided to grab a drink. We went into a place called "Lion beer Hall" which was a your basic beer themed restaurant. Quite pricey, and all the staff would scream everytime another customer walked in. I'm pretty sure they were yelling "welcome, pleased to meet you", but I honestly have no idea.

After that we continued on. Just walking, staring, taking occasional photos. Some of the architechture is amazing. Eventually we grabbed something to eat in a tiny little place which was basically a basement. Woo's chicken was great, my lamb was average.

We then headed back to the train station and caught a train to Shinjuku. The busiest train station in the world. And it felt like it. It was about 7pm on a Saturday night, and the place was nuts. We got out of the station, heading to the Tokyo "red light district" known as Kabukicho.
"Kubikicho" sounds like a westerner made up a name to sound Japanese, but it is really what its called. As we walked out of he train station I was hit with my first "we are in Tokyo" moment. There were people EVERYWHERE. A sea of neon and giant screens blasted our eyes and a constant stream of high pitched Japanese chatter filled our ears. Japans pedestrian crossings dont beep. They have their own little theme song. It's hard to explain, but very cool.

So we walked though Kabukicho looking for a bar. We would get accosted every 40 metres or so, usually by a Japanese dude, but also by some big black dudes. They wanted us to go into their establishment, paying 5000 yen to do so. We would apparently get all you can drink for an hour while we watch some Japanese girl take her clothes off. One dude offered us 4000 yen. 90min free drinks, shower with a girl, then massage, then sex, if we liked. Seems like a good deal. But paying for sex is not the sort of thing I am ever going to do.

Later, we found out what tends to happen in those places is you pay your money to get in, have your drinks, then when you try to leave, they charge your 10000yen to leave. Sneaky fuckers.

So, we found a nice little pub which made the weakest bourbon and cola's in the world. Stayed there for a few drinks and then headed out again. There was another hour or so of walking before we found a "Hub". The Hub's are a franchised English style pub. Not really what we wanted, but inside it was cosy and had lots of ambience and chatter. The beer wasn't ridiculously priced, and the waitress was cute, so it was all we were looking for. And frankly I was very tired of being asked if I would like to play with Japanese girls by big scary black mofos...

We left the Hub at around 11:30ish, and then headed home on the second last train. When we got off the train in Shinigawa, the last trains were coming soon, and people were running around everywhere.

Anyway, we got home fine and went to sleep.

Woo snores like a plane taking off, but apparently so do i.

The trip to Tokyo

Woo and I were flying out to Japan on Friday night. Drew was nice enough to give us a lift to the airport. As we drove from Como, along Great Eastern Highway, it occurred to Woo and I that Drew was, in all his genius, taking us to the domestic airport. So that was a good start.

After arriving at Perth's enormous international airport (we can certainly see where all the mining dollars are being spent), Woo and I did the standard waiting for a plane procedure. Ate, bought magazines and smoked a few last minute cigarettes before the flight.

On a visit to the bathroom I noticed there are now lcd screens on the hand dryers in the bathrooms. Holy Jesus in heaven! You cant avoid the advertising anywhere anymore.

When we finally went through the gate to board the plane there was another line. Woo and I waited til nearly the front of this line before we realised we needed to fill out our departure cards. There was a mad scramble as we searched or the cards and a pen with which to fill them out before reaching the front of the line. The customs lady was impressed with our speed as she informed us whe would have been more than happy to send us to the back of the line. "the walk of shame" she called it, if our forms had not been filled out.

This began a certain attraction towards Woo from all the security staff at Perth airport. He had to completely empty his bag, getting his moisturiser thrown out in the process, before getting frisked as prepared to go up the escalators. I avoided any such trouble. I guess I just look way less dodgy...

The flight was the same as any flight before it. I didn't feel like I got any sort of sleep, but woke up at 6am having not looked at my watch since 1am, so figured I must've done okay.

One thing I did notice about this particular flights was that there was a large proportion of flight attendants that seemed very old. One looked to be in his mid fifties, which prompted me to inform Woo that if I was ever that old and still in a customer service, customer facing role, he had permission to kill me.

I did wake up from my slumber just in time to see an amazing sunrise over the Pacific Ocean as we flew north towards Tokyo. It started with the faintest shimmer of red against a pitch black, starry sky. Gradually growing brighter and more orange as we flew on. It was truly beautiful, but I fear I didn't fully appreciate it as I was still barely lucid.

Upon landing at Narita airport, Woo had I momentarily freaked out about the fact that we were finally here. We were finally in Japan. It was all a bit different. There was a train at the airport to take your from the gates to the terminal. I had seen this before at KL, but it was new for Woo.

After disembarking the Train and walking towards the baggage claim, an Aussie genteman who was travelling with his son asked if we had gotten the second form from the Qantas staff. We hadn't, but we figured we'd get a copy as we went though customs. The standard small talk followed between ourselves and this dude. He was going snowbaording in Niseko, and didn't even know of the world cup qualifier that was to be played in Yokohama on Wednesday night.

Thats fine, the guy isn't here for the soccer. I undertand. But then he uttered some immeasureable stupidity when he asked if the Australian team was playing the Japanese team.
No, champ. They're playing Kazakstan. They're just here because of the weather. hehehe

After collecting our bags and getting our ticket to Shinigawa (where our hotel was) Woo decided he desperately needed a smoke. You cant just go outside and smoke at the Narita airport. You go outside, then you go into a specially designed glass smoking room. I like to call it the smoking bubble, and Woo was trapped inside.

As far as my early impressions of Japan at this point go, all I can say is that there must be some Toro's in the atmosphere because BURRR it's cold up here!! On more than one occasion Woo or I mentioned how nippy it was, until we decided that that particular adjective was probably not the best one to use in Japan, and we have since moved on to "crisp".

After woo had finished his cigarette we were running a little late for the Narita express to Shinigawa. We got to the bottom of the escalators in from of where carriage 4 would be stopping on the platform. A little Japanese man looked at my ticket and proclaimed with some urgency while pointing frantically to the left. "Not 4. Nine. NINE!!!" We ran to the desired section and boarded thetrain just in time. We sat down with a satisfied feeling, as I proclaimed to Woo that the hardest part of the trip was over. That it would be piss easy to find our hotel from the station.

Not exactly true. Once we arrived at Shinigawa station, I was expection giant signs telling us which way to the Prince Hotel. We walked around the station about 4 times before we finally asked someone who worked there, and he pointed us in the right direction.

We arrived at our hotel and were informed it would be another hour and a half til check in. So we left our bags with the baggage girls and went to find somewhere to get a beer and a feed. We found a little Japanese (who would have thunk it) place under the Shinigawa train station. This was after we decided against paying 3800 yen (roughly $90) for a steak from Austraria (their spelling, not mine). To Woo's delight, this little Japanese restaurant would serve beer, plus you could smoke at the table. Exactly what he was looking for, especially after his encounter with the Narita Airport smoking bubble.

Now, I need to warn you that you do not want to read the next paragraph. If you know whats best for you, you will skip it. Trust me.

After the meal, I needed to drop some kiddies off at the pool, but it was still not check-in time. So I used to loo at the hote lobby. Little did I know this would be close to a life changing experience. Firstly, the toilet seat was heated. I have not sat on a heated toilet seat before, and let me tell you, it warms more than just the cockles of your heart. Secondly, after laying all the necessary cable, I noticed that this toilet had a "shower" function. Could this be a bidet? Again, something I had not experienced before. I pressed the button and to my surprise a stream of water hit me bullseye in the anus. I still struggle to figure out how it's aim is so good. Is there some form of radar? Anus detecting technology? Either way, it was a whole new world of poo. But now we shall never speak of that again.

Now, at this point you should know that there are hundreds of smoking hotties walking around in Tokyo and surrounds. In fact I think that was part of the reason Woo and I had such trouble negotiating Shinigawa station, as we were stopping to stare at all the gorgeous girls.

We were discussing this on our way back into the hotel, after seeing another gorgeous girl walk past, when I exclaimed that there were just no fatties walking around. As is always the way, the very moment I mentioned this, and giant wad of lard walked around the corner of the lobby and proceeded directly past us. It's all in the timing, and Woo and I had more than a chuckle as we continued up to our room.

Our room is tiny. Really tiny. It has a safe, a mirror that doesn't fog up in a square over the sink, and an emergency torch. However it doesn't have a bar ridge. Disappointing.

Although, I did find a headband in one of the draws. Well, at least I think it's a headband. It is now my blogging headband which I will wear as I blog each morning/ night.

And with that, sayonara.